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Messages - Dais Clash

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1
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: October 13, 2014, 05:38:36 am »
"Oh, so you must be staying right here?" said Dais with a grin, stopping right outside the Carousel Boutique that both ponies were conveniently passing at that very moment "Great!"

Dais looks around and adds quietly "So, meet me here at sunrise tomorrow so we can keep finding your house? I hear Rarity's been to the Everfree forest tons of times, so she'll be able to offer some good advice. You know, I was a bit sad that I'm not able to blow up your house yet, but if it means I get to spend time with awesome friends then I guess it's not all bad. Don't worry, I'm sure we'll find your house somewhere in Equestria. It'll be all blown up - I mean, err, found - before you know it."

With a smile Dais began to walk off. "I would pop in for a chat with Rarity but I'm afraid I have one last order of business for the day, so I'll leave you here. Just need to tell those rude ponies who put their fancy new house right where yours used to be to go away. Anyway, see you later!"

2
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: October 11, 2014, 08:26:37 am »
Dais grinned broadly. "Phew, I didn't think you'd recover that fast after being abducted and apparently sedated by a giant octopus" he remarked, turning to see the sun starting to lower in the sky "Yeah, I guess you're right. We've got a full day's worth of house-hunting ahead of us tomorrow if we want to reach the middle of the Everfree forest. Good searching so far, though maybe try not too fall too far behind next time?"

Apparently oblivious to Carri's gaffe, Dais began trotting down the lane back towards Ponyville. "So whose home are you living in now that yours is gone?" he asked nonchalantly "I have an extra couple of spare rooms at my house - you're quite welcome to stay there if you ever need them?"

3
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: October 10, 2014, 07:06:29 am »
Panicking, Dais swam frantically back the way he went, hoping Carri hadn't been abducted by a giant octopus or anything (or maybe his imagination was just getting the better of him, he thought). Just as he thought Carri had to be lost and was about to swim back up to call in a rescue party, he turned around to see a giant octopus had been chasing him all around the lake. Not seeing Carri sleeping on the Octopus, he panicked even more.

Dais would have screamed, but of course being underwater it mostly just came out as a whole bunch of bubbles. The octopus advanced menacingly, cornering Dais against an underwater rock. Dais backed up, full of fear, his hind hooves bucking inadvertently, his fore-hooves covering his face in a futile attempt to protect himself, and his eyes clenched shut as he imagined what was about to happen. The octopus lifted a giant tentacle up above Dais as if to strike...

Only to throw down a tax form the council had delivered. In crude ink, the octopus had written something about the form not being waterproof enough, though it was hard to make out because the paper was all ripped, torn and broken.

With a huge sigh of relief but still maintaining quite a heavy shake of fear, Dais nodded quickly as a signal to the Octopus.

The Octopus didn't change its serious expression. With another quick swipe of its tentacle, it casually tossed Carri off its head and back towards its home.

Dais was so happy to finally see Carri alive again that he almost didn't catch her. In the last moment before she was about to smash into the rock, Dais grabbed her and teleported them both back to the shore of the lake.

Wasting no time, Dais spat out his breathing tube and started shaking the sleeping filly violently. "Carri!? You alive Carri? Are you ok? How many hooves am I holding up?"

4
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: October 02, 2014, 10:33:16 am »
Dais swims along, occasionally stopping and waiting for Carri while she catches up, or simply to look around for a house. Various eyes seem to stare at both ponies out of dark holes and underlake caverns. Eventually, Dais casts some kind of spell to make his horn emit a soft light, which makes things slightly easier to see.

After passing a small shipwreck, various ancient artifacts and a big treasure chest, Dais finally reached a sign saying "The Bottom Of The Lake". Smiling to himself, Dais looked around one more time for the house, then turned back to wait for Carri with a shrug.

As soon as he turned away, a giant octopus came up behind him completely silently.

5
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: September 30, 2014, 09:05:17 pm »
Dais was still confused. With a slight frown of annoyance, he swam over in the direction of Carri, narrowly missing being struck by her wildly thrashing hooves.

In a crude attempt at dumbshow, Dais first held a hoof to his chest right in front of Carri to emphasize how slowly he was breathing. Then he pointed to Carri, before holding a hoof above his eyes as though he were searching the horizon. Then, finally, he motioned for her to follow him (as opposed to the fish) before turning to swim deeper into the dark water.

Dais just hoped that if Carri could be distracted by one small fish, she wouldn't lose focus on the search when confronted with the multitude of other weird things that he had heard dwelt down in the depths of the lake.

6
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: September 30, 2014, 01:23:46 pm »
"Oh, umm... fantastic?" replied Dais, still confused after watching Carri thrash about in the water for some time. He quickly swam over until he floated right beside her. "This looks as good a place to go down as any. You ready? Three... two... one..."

With a swift movement Dais bit down on to the breathing tube and kicked himself down beneath the surface. Casually he worked his way down to the rocky, algae-studded ground beneath the lake (shooing away a small school of fish as he did so) and waited for Carri to come down after him.

7
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: September 30, 2014, 05:51:50 am »
"Right, uh..." Dais stammered. Something was amiss about Carri's lack of enthusiasm. Didn't she want to find her stuff? Dais eyed her skeptically for a moment, wondering what was going on.

"Carri, unless you know something I don't" said Dais a little cautiously, the logical side of his brain kicking into gear "I don't think you're going to find your house over there. Look, there's no house protruding above the surface of the lake. That means your house must be at least at the depth equal to the height of your house, and I seem to recall that the house was somewhat bigger than you. So if you can still stand where the water reaches up to, that means you're not looking deep enough."

8
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: September 29, 2014, 01:21:14 am »
Dais wasted no time in magically putting his suit on while running at a tire swing, completely oblivious to Carri's dilemma. "WHEEEE!" he cheered as he somersaulted into the lake, splashing the cool water everywhere.

After a few seconds Dais resurfaced and noticed Carri looking distinctly frozen on the side of the lake. "I know, my awesome dives tend to have that effect" he said humbly "Come on in, the water's fine!"

9
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: September 28, 2014, 12:15:50 am »
"But... how're you going to see your house from above the water?" asked Dais, confused "I'm going to need you to help me find it. And besides, nopony should go diving alone if they can avoid it. You need to be able to see if I'm in trouble."

They reached the edge of the pristine blue lake, gleaming brightly in the sunlight.

"Try your suit on" instructed Dais as he passed over one of the suits to Carri "And don't worry - I'm here to help you out if you get into any trouble."

10
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: September 27, 2014, 01:07:26 pm »
"Two diving outfits, please" said Dais neutrally to the green earth pony at the diving shop, handing over a small bag of bits "One in foal size. We're going to the bottom of the Ponyville lake!"
The green mare behind the counter rolled her eyes. "You're not off on another pointless adventure to achieve something you could probably have resolved much easier that will certainly endanger the lives of yourself and your friends, are you?"
Dais giggled. "Exactly!" he laughed "You know me too well!"
"Typical" muttered the earth pony under her breath as she went to fetch the diving outfits.

"Alright" Dais began explaining "Last time I went diving was a few years ago, but I remember how to do most of it. Just remember to keep looking out for me in case I'm in trouble, and I'll keeping a look out for you too. Breathe slowly and don't swim off too far alone."

The mare returned with two outfits. "Come back if these are too tight or loose on either of you" she said "And thanks for stopping by."

Dais waved the mare farewell and turned down the street, magically levitating the diving suits behind him as he made for the lake. "So Carri - you swim much? Ever been diving in this lake before?"

11
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: September 27, 2014, 01:08:52 am »
Dais smiled, with his eyes narrowed. "I didn't know you were such an explorer Carri!" he said excitedly "I've never even been to... well... actually I don't think I've ever been to any of those places. This is so cool! And while we're there you can show me around. Better move quickly though - I've heard some of them places can be dangerous, so I guess it's probably not where you'll be wanting to leave your house or your stuff. Also I don't want to leave my demolition crew waiting for too long. And if we don't hurry then the diving shop's going to close, and I suppose you don't have a diving suit to hand. That Ponyville lake is pretty deep in places, and that's the first place on my list to check."

Dais turned and began strolling directly towards the diving shop. "Come on!" he called after Carri "This is going to be so much fun!"

12
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: September 26, 2014, 03:56:28 am »
"Right!" said Dais excitedly with a confident nod "I love going exploring!"

Although Dais was happy to explore and find the house, he wasn't really sure about where he could look. Usually if a house just appeared in the middle of the road or such there would be a big commotion as ponies wondered what was going on, but he hadn't heard of anything unusual happening today. I would most likely be somewhere obvious, but somewhere where nopony would realize it was there.

"Alright now, where could it be..." pondered Dais "Tell you what Carri, I'll rattle off a list of places, and you let me know if any sound like the sort of place you might have left the house. Alright - bottom of the Ponyville lake? Middle of the Everfree Forest? Saddle Arabia? Froggy bottom bog? Tenochtitlan Basin? Buried underneath the theater? Flame Geyser Swamp? Middle of Tartarus? Banished to the moon?"

13
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: September 26, 2014, 12:58:04 am »
"I'll help you move your stuff Carri!" said Dais heroically. He was really glad that he could be of service.

Then he looked around, puzzled. There was a long awkward moment where Dais didn't really know what to do or say. "Um, where's your house gone anyway? Did you move it somewhere? Did that moving give you cotton wing?" he asked quickly.

14
Ponyville / Re: Blowing stuff up
« on: September 17, 2014, 12:29:28 pm »
"So anyway" said Dais, strolling up to the street the house stood on confidently "The house we're looking to demolish is right..."

Dais blinked twice to make sure his eyes weren't deceiving him. This wasn't the same house.

"Uh - should be this one right here?"

Torpex laughed a little to himself "This house here? This isn't the old run-down house you described."
Dais looked confused. "But... it was right here! Must be some sort of magic spell or something!"
"Sorry Dais" said Nitro "This house looks like somepony lives here. We can't just go demolishing somepony's house while they're in it!"
Frantically, Dais magically summoned a map of Ponyville. "See? Right here. Old abandoned house. It says so pretty clearly."
"Well then the map must be out of date" replied Tovex "This is a house alright, but it looks neither old nor abandoned."
"Hey" said Torpex "What's with that little foal patrolling in front of the house? Is she your guard or something Dais?"

Dais looked around shiftily as he caused the map to disappear again. "Uh - would you excuse me for a moment? I might want to go over there and talk to her. You know, ummm, just in case she knows what's going on."
"Alright" said Nitro "Although... I think we would be willing to blow it up, if the price was right Dais. Just remember that."
"Don't worry, I can assure you it's both old and abandoned!" called Dais as he left the three demolition ponies behind.

"Hey Carri!" called Dais "I've got my demolition crew all ready. How're you doing?"

15
Ponyville / Blowing stuff up
« on: September 13, 2014, 09:46:46 am »
Dais' coat was looking somewhat more pale blue than usual, as it often did when he was being overworked. The mayor always managed to find a lot for him to do, most of which seemed designed to just generate a whole lot of meaningless paperwork to convince the ponyfolk of Ponyville that the mayor was generally busier than she actually was. Which - Dais was slowly starting to discover - wasn't actually all that much. Still, Dais persevered happily through the long thankless hours, both because he cared deeply about Ponyville, and because one day he was going to be the mayor.

And as a somewhat more guilty pleasure - as soon as all the work blew over, the mayor did give him the papers to build a new homeless shelter on the site of an old abandoned house in Ponyville. Dais had neglected to mention to the mayor that two young fillies were squatting there already, but he figured at least one of them should probably be sent to hospital anyway, and the other he could ensure found room at the shelter. He also thought he had her todo list for some reason that he couldn't remember very well. He'd return that as soon as he could.

Now that his work was finally over, the time for the fireworks had arrived. It had been several days since he was supposed to have blown up the house but he had done his best. A few days behind schedule was nothing to worry about, but it would not be wise to put it off any longer either.

Soon enough Dais left his office to find three bulky ponies carrying several large barrels and charges outside the town hall. They probably would have been very suspicious to any random passing pony, but since Dais had become mayoral assistant, his wacky plans often drew all sorts of strange ponies to town. And besides, the TNT Bros. vests they were wearing made them look much like construction ponies.

"Mister Dais Clash?" asked one of the ponies.
"Indeed - and you must be the explosives guys ready to blow up that old house I wrote to you about."
"Torpex, Nitro and Tovex - the TNT brothers at your service, purveyors o' the finest explosives in Equestria."
"I see. And are you sure this will blow up the house completely? I don't want any debris falling around the neighborhood."
"This is a magically enhanced explosive" explained Torpex "You can rest assured that anything within the explosive range will be completely obliterated forever. Even the magic of an alicorn princess would have a very hard time bringing anything back that's been properly exploded with this stuff. Just a brief flash, a loud boom and then it's all quite cleanly gone."
"Perfect!" Dais lit up "So how much does it cost?"
"Well as you can imagine, an explosive as great as this doesn't come cheap" said Nitro "It takes forever to get the magical spell just right."
"And as such" continued Tovex "We do charge something of a premium."
"Uhh - how much?" continued Dais, wondering why spooky music seemed to be playing in his ears.
"Oh - we don't want your bits" laughed Torpex "We have more than enough of those. What we want from you, Dais, is a concession."

"That's it?!" asked Dais "Perfect - I concede that I am the coolest mayoral assistant in..."
"Not that kind of concession!" snapped Tovex "We want you to lobby the mayor to change the law!"
"Change the law?" asked Dais "You got it - I've long thought we could save so much on ink if we only printed our laws in another font..."
"Not a font change Dais" said Nitro "We want to be able to sell our explosives to Diamond Dogs."

Dais looked confused "Diamond Dogs? You do know those things enslave ponies right?"
"Come on" replied Torpex "Just because Diamond Dogs are usually cruel doesn't mean they're going to use our explosives for evil."
"Yeah - if Diamond Dogs had our explosives" pointed out Nitro "They won't need to enslave ponies to do their dirty work - the explosives will do it all!"
"And think how much money we'll make!" added Tovex. The other two brothers seemed to glare at him for saying this.
"I don't know" said Dais uneasily. He knew the mayor could be something of a pushover when an official asked her to change the law.
"Come on" said Torpex "It's only slightly corrupt, but the benefit for ponies throughout the region will be huge."
"And besides, that's the only price at which you're getting your hooves on these explosives" threw in Nitro.
Dais sighed. "Alright fine" he said "I'll ask the mayor tomorrow."
"It sounds like we have a deal, mister Dais Clash" smiled Torpex "Now let's move out and blow that house up."

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